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I tried to fit into a crowd of friends but I still felt alone. I was wearing a mask they couldn’t see past, that mask was my ego.

I was the one creating unbearable weight. I was the source of my pain. I was afraid of who I’d become without alcohol.

My addict brain is used to learning things the hard way. I would think of myself as “different” and would use that as an excuse to do things “my way”.